Sometimes my mind turns on me
And it becomes my own worst enemy.
The poisonous thoughts inside my head
Just won’t let; they want me dead.
One day they may find me lying on the floor
When I just couldn’t take the thoughts anymore.
People will be wondering what went wrong
When I’ve been trying to tell them all along.
It’s not that I don’t have people who care
People have tried, but they don’t get anywhere.
You can’t help those who won’t help themselves
But I fail in my efforts just like everyone else.
“You can’t fix stupid”, is what people say
So is there any hope for me anyway?
I can’t keep a job; I’m never content
I fail every time when my thoughts won’t relent.
I’m drowning in here; it’s like I can’t breathe
I can’t sleep or think from all the anxiety.
I feel worthless, rejected, sinful, and weak
And my feelings just get worse when I can’t sleep.
So I sit at this table in the middle of the night
Knowing the thoughts in my head just can’t be right.
Now that the poem is written I can go back to bed
Because I’ve calmed the demons that exist in my head.